Social Networks and Relationships... Do you choose your fate?

I see a lot of people talking about relationships whether its friends, work, romantic etc and social networking and I think I have a pretty strong opinion on whether it works or doesn't. I wanna touch on this subject mostly because some people can't handle certain things and I think at that point it will determine if you should have one or not.

Friends and social networking can get kind of sticky from what I know and have experienced personally. Like my friend Shay and I always say... I am not sitting at a high school cafeteria. Basically, I do not expect my friends to ONLY be friends with who I am friends with and vice versa. I think that is completely petty of someone to think "I am not friends with you so my friends wont be either" I mean really? Just because you don't mesh well with someone does not mean that another person who MAY happen to be in your circle wont. Lets grow up people. Another thing I have noticed is twitter and Facebook becoming some people's life and they don't seem to do anything else. Who are we kidding? Some of the time you are WASTING wondering who is tweeting whom and who said what and did what with or to whom is childish and could be spent making money. We all are in a position to make a better life for our self... If you have all that time you couldn't possibly be doing everything that you should or could be doing. It really bothers me when I see mothers doing it the most. Seriously, lets get lives people.

Work and social media have to be the most careless mistake I see happening. I mean really think about it. You don't make "best friends" at work. You may make friends but can you really trust everyone at work? No not at all. I don't see why your coworkers need to be apart of your private life and why people continue to slander and down talk their position and or company knowing they have people on work from there. For instance, you will never see me putting information about my job on a social network. At that point you have opened pandora's box and you are leaving room for error. I have witnessed people tweeting and facebooking that they have called out of work and were really not sick the silly part about that is you have "friends" on your FB and who follow you on twitter and they are all at work while you play hookey (sp?)... Do you really think that your coworkers/friends really wont care? Oh please. They will bite your back out the second they get a chance to. Watch what you do. Beyond coworkers there are networking departments for your company that go through and search for your name, or people who use those keywords including the company name on social sites. So if you say your jobs name on one and they search and you come up... but you are bad mouthing the company... Hmmm wonder what the consequences for that would be? Lets try to work on that. Besides the internet although you think it might be really is not your personal diary or public journal. There are other ways to "do what you want" without including and or bad mouthing your company. I mean really if it is that bad I would suggest getting a new gig.  

The main one I want to address would be the romantic relationship part of social networking... One thing I never understood was if you are going to stalk one anothers page OR question every opposite sex that appears on your other half's feed or timeline why follow or friend them? I'm going to chalk it up to WANTING to be upset. News flash... Someone is always going to want the person you are with in some way shape or form so why put yourself through that? Furthermore, why be with the person? I know I've seen thing in my relationships that were COMPLETELY unacceptable and I handled them the way I should in my opinion. Hardly kicking up dust but taking a mental note and sliding it in my back pocket to do with what I wish later. *evil laugh* I mean there are ways of "fixing" a problem without always questioning. I keep certain people blocked, I also filter who gets to see what... I am nice like that. Don't take up any issues you have with your other half with anyone they are interacting with UNLESS you KNOW that they know about you and are being disrespectful toward you. Another person does not care if you are in a relationship if they don't know you... If they don't like you.  Why would they? They are out for self and self only. Use your brains.

If you can't cope in a social network environment accordingly, you shouldn't be on one. You choose to be in the mind state that you are in no one else. No one can "make you mad" you allowed them to do that. No one can make you crazy... you did it to yourself. I think that relationships that are healthy can make it through anything... As long as there is honesty. If you can't be honest, that trust is broken... trust is a requirement you can't make it in a relationship without it. Think about it. Watch, listen and be quiet. Its your best tool to making choices.

Why America is fat... The future of our children...

I remembered back in my child days I was ALWAYS outside. Any no school day I couldn't wait to get outside with my friends and do all kinds of things like, riding bikes, playing tag, making fake club houses, pretending to be in the gymnastics etc... My friends and I loved it. A parent couldn't pay us to go inside. During school days it was get off the bus, run home, do homework then chores and hurry and get as much play time as possible in before the street lights. Ahhh.... the GREAT YEARS.

I remember my parent cooking full course meals and being creative with different varieties of food. I loved home cooked meals... Oh and yes, that included vegetables. When we would ask my mom or dad for fast food sometimes they would say yes, most times they would say no. My moms favorite line when we asked to go to burger king was yes we are going to BK and when we said YAAAYYY she would say Brenda's Kitchen. LMAOOOO that's STILL funny to me. It tickles me how clever my parents are.

As I look at the last few years I noticed a trend. A huge one. Kids are getting so HUGE at a young age. I don't really care that I shouldn't say that or that your kid may be one or that you thought I was out of line. The reality is parents arent making their kids go outside, or do any physical activity of any kind. Not even chores. Parents arent forcing children to eat vegetables and on top of that not making them eat anything that is on the pyramid except the sugars section. I will say those types of parent DRIVE ME.... Seriously, you are the parent be that. The amount of hormones that are in foods these days and whatever else we dont even know about is just a sick thought. You want your children to eat that?? GROSS.

Parents, Wanna know why your daughter has a butt and growing breasts at a young age? Too early it seems? You have the hormones in food to thank for that. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

McDonald's isn't a meal, nor is burger king, taco bell, or anyother pull up to the window place. Take your lazy self home and cook. Oh and lay off the fried foods. Please purchase a child a bike and skates before you buy an xbox. Thanks in advance

Signed,

-A Concerned Major.

With the cards up ALL TRUST....

So.. You are with this person and everything seems great from the outside looking in. Some might even be jealous of the relationship that you and your partner have... Walk with me as I explore what may REALLY be going on and how it can possibly be avoided....

I'm not a person that thinks she should preach to others, but I am a person that is asked "advice" a lot and I am more than happy to give it when needed... certain things though... Cannot be fixed unless the person fixes self internally. 

A couple... Been together for as long as they can remember as far as one knows about the other there are no infidelity cards that were played... So why is it that one of the parties is constantly accusing the other of doing such a thing? I used to think it was solely based on the saying, "you go accusing someone of cheating or looking to catch them its probably because you are up to know good yourself". That is not always true. The question will always remain the same for me. Why go look? What is so important to "find out" and to constantly look for when you never had a reason to look in the first place? Have you caught that person doing something that they should never be forgiven for? Have they even given you anything to go on? No? OH....

Whenever I think about or hear about an insecure person I always assume their background will tell the story. A background story should never be the "excuse" but it does make it more understandable... Yet and still... what is the point of being with someone who you cant/don't trust?? What exactly are you gaining? Is it out of being comfortable?
Maybe you are so used to someone doing you wrong and not trusting people that you look so you can be justified by some disgusting demented pleasure as to say "aha, i knew you were just like the rest? Maybe?

At this point, here is my opinion on infidelity...
What is done in the dark ALWAYS comes to light. Don't go looking for anything. Let the stuff fall right in your lap and then you deal with it accordingly. I wouldn't freak out and go crazy either. Give the person a chance to explain and be honest (do not say anything to your partner until you have cold hard facts and possibly seen something that you can quote word for word or explain exactly what was seen) People tend to get scared when you are calm as opposed to irrational and angry. You attract more bees with honey than with vinegar. Once the person explains then you can decide whether or not they are worth the time and effort to work things out... To just go looking just because however, is another story.

A relationship is based on trust and communication. If you cannot trust a person how could you possible stay in a relationship with them? What are you gaining? Why invade someone's privacy? Yes, in a relationship there is still privacy. One does not need to know the other's passwords and it is not a rule that one knows the other.

I feel like... If you cant trust your relationship and you don't even know why then you probably don't trust yourself. Maybe you should try being single and finding yourself and getting rid of the turmoil within yourself before you get in a relationship and reek havoc in someone else's  life... That's just rude.

"All I need is a partner
to play spades with the cards up, ALL TRUST"

Men and their wedding rings.

Lately, I have noticed a lot of people getting married. Younger couples are starting to make their own "rules" for their marriages. Whenever I see these couples I noticed that either no one is wearing a wedding ring OR one of them isn't. I always wondered why one isn't... Especially if its the man because it seems when the man doesn't wear his ring the wives seem to dismiss it or they may have an attitude about it but "mums the word" about it. The man always has an excuse like, "it itches" or "it attracts more women" or "I work in a field where i cant wear it" to me it all seems like BS. Truthfully... I don't think that ANY of those reasons are true and if they are why don't women make those excuses? Do women naturally have "non itch fingers" or is the wedding ring a force field around us and no man will talk to us if we wear ours? Or do jobs only allow women to wear their rings and its banned for men? Don't worry, Ill wait for a real reason.... The reason I am asking this and why i am so puzzled about it is because the men that DON'T wear their wedding rings are the SAME EXACT men that would have an entire baby about their wives not wearing theirs. Now correct me if I'm wrong but that's a HUGE double standard. I just want to know the real reason? I know there is that saying where "its not cheating if you don't wear your ring" and i want to know if most men stand by that? I am pretty open-minded and i feel that if a husband can make excuses as to why he should not wear his ring, I would like to know why it IS NOT okay for a wife to do the same? I mean as a husband and wife and everyone who was at your wedding saw you take vows to become husband and wife and that the rings were exchanged AND they said the rings bound you together until death do you part am i right? I feel that whether you're a husband or a wife those rings need to be worn all the time until the end OR no one should have to wear them. One shouldn't be "allowed" and the other "has to". Maybe that's me and my crazy thought process and I don't know any better because I am not yet married. If that's the case let that be the reason, but I know what foul smells like when stench is in the air. This is just food for thought *Shrug* -Major

*Pondering*

I was having a conversation with my friends a few days ago and I had a question that bothered a lot of women we were with… My question was, If a girl and a guy end up getting pregnant and he is all on board… Fully involved with the pregnancy, making sure your comfortable, making sure the baby comes into the world happy, making sure the child isn’t without and everything and you KNOW he is going to be like the greatest father, is there something wrong with him testing the child after they come? Whats so wrong with it? Personally I thought about it and i think in this day and age it is TOTALLY necessary. Would this make another woman feel a type of way? I feel like a lot of women “trick” dudes into taking care of another man’s responsibility. I think its unfair. Is it saying he doesn’t trust you? In my opinion, no. I feel like someone can trust someone but you can never be “too protective” of your OWN neck at the same time. As much as you want to trust someone you HAVE to make sure YOUR taken care of too. This to me doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with that particular female. I feel like its a precaution that men should be able to take. I see nothing wrong with it. Am i wrong?

Lessons

There are five things that you cannot recover in life:(1) The Stone………..after it’s thrown,(2) The Word……………after it’s said,(3) The Occasion……after it’s missed, and(4) The Time………….after it’s gone.(5) A person……………after they die

**UNTITLED**

I used to love you.
But I can’t anymore.
This makes no sense
I’m walking out the door.

I want all my stuff
If you want to fight keep it
If I would have known
That it would come to this.
I would have left a long time ago

Now is not the time to dwell
I can’t allow this to happen again
I consumed myself with you
Maybe even lost who I am
Everything I used to do
Is a thing of the past
Im tired of these circles
Not to mention your lying, cheating, @$$

I can’t take this anymore
I used to love you
I have my bags, don’t try and stop me at the door
From the first time you said hello
I should have said goodbye
You wouldn’t leave it alone
So I decided to give you a try

I guess it’s safe to say
That I made my own bed
Dealing with you in the first place
For allowing you in my head.
I should have been real with myself
I knew you weren’t the one
So now the damage is done.

Time for me to spread my wings
Allow me time to do me
Never will I come back
So please don’t ask
You didn’t want me when you had me
And I know you’re starting to see
You really had something good
And you didn’t treat me like you should

*ShaunaMarie*